Ok, so tomorrow is the big day! ha ha The dreaded Psych evaluation! Two and a half hours of testing. Wow. I have this huge funny scenario going on in my head...where they talk to me, give me the paper tests, and never let me leave. Instead, they fit me into one of those comfy white jackets where you hug yourself, inject me with happy medicine to keep me from freaking out, and then ship me out in a big white van that has no windows. Yup, that is the funny version of the crazy lady shipping out.
Honestly though, I am sure it will be fine! I have a great outlook on this journey, and what it entails. I just need to get this appointment over with so I can move on to the REAL stuff. ha ha ha I know this is an important appointment in the 'journey', and I'm not really taking it lightly, so don't worry. I know it's for my own good and for them to sign off on my surgery I have to be serious and know what I'm getting myself into. ALSO, hopefully this visit will help some of my friends UNDERSTAND that YES, I DO know what I'm doing. I've had several well-wishing friends freak out a little bit about my decision to do the Gastric Bypass surgery. They love me, and I get that. They feel it's their Duty to tell me I need to research this procedure and see all the risks I'm getting into because their sister, or friend of their cousin, or cousins uncles nephews grandma had it done, AND MAN! It was terrible for them. I am glad they care enough to feel the need to be dutiful. However, once a decision like THIS has been made by someone...there is really no words that can stop the ball from rolling. Negative or otherwise.
So, please know, my dear friends, that I LOVE you all. I am glad you feel the duty calling, or as most of you have just been big supporters - knowing this is my own personal journey and understanding that the decision is made.
There is no need to 'explain' the reasons behind those 'duty' friends. I know why they feel the need. I've been there too. I just wish that there was more support thrown in with the 'duty emails'.
In all honesty....what I really need is just a bunch of "WE LOVE YOU, LANA!!!" comments, and prayers that all will be done with God standing next to the Surgeons and guiding their hands.
Many people don't GET IT how hard life can be when you're obese. I don't want to wake up 5 years from now fatter than ever ... and everything else that goes with that life. I want to try and BE the me I used to be. If I had not tried everything else out there....do you think I'd be doing this? Let me restate something I heard from my Doctor...."Only 10% of obese people who actually lose the weight on their own are successful in keeping it off". So I say this....let's go find all those people on the Biggest Loser from 5 years ago...oh wait! The show isn't that old? hmmmmm Anyway you see my train of thought here.
Wish me well on the crazy tests tomorrow. I have my upper GI (reflux) appointment on the 7th of April, and two support group meetings. March 21st, and April 18th I think. THEN I can get a surgery date!
Thank you ... all of you. I appreciate every single one of you that loves me enough to care to read this babble. LOL